How Parental Expectation Affects the Piano Teacher

Understanding Parental Expectations

I have two little seven year olds that I teach on Saturdays, a boy and a girl. The mother was really pushing the boy to take lessons because he showed interest in music and asked for lessons. This is fair enough. But the mother wasn't quite as gung-ho about the daughter taking lessons because she felt the daughter was more interested in art and not music.

However, the father disagreed. He convinced his wife to give both children lessons, and made his daughter commit to lessons for a minimum of six months. His argument was that she had a hidden talent for the piano that his wife was not fully recognizing.

Both parents thought that the little boy - who asked for lessons and seemed the more interested of the two kids - would be more interested, would practice more, and would for the most part be the better student. By contrast, the parents thought the daughter would be less interested, would have to be prodded and pushed more to keep her interest, and would generally be the lesser student.

Guess what happened? Exactly the reverse.

It has been difficult keeping the little boy's attention any longer than 20 minutes. He can't wait for the lesson to end, he's not practicing as much as his sister, and shows an overall lack of interest in the more theoretical aspect of musicianship.

And his sister? Well, she doesn't want the lesson to end! She exhibits more drive, determination and ambition than her brother. And she has a learning disorder on top of that to boot!

A big part of teaching piano is knowing the potential pitfalls of parental expectation. Parents don't always know or agree on their children's unique skills and abilities. Therefore, a good teacher will evaluate the students based on her own proven methods, and not solely on the parents' expectations or ideas of their children's abilities.